I just miss him so much; words can’t even explain how I feel some days. When Im having one of my “I miss you days” I really don’t want to speak with anyone but him. I can try to explain how I feel to my mom but truly she can never understand how I feel, she has never been away from my dad for more than 4 or 5 days at a time. I’m going on 4 months of not seeing him, and at this rate I wont get to see him again till January or February.
He told me the other day to remember we are in the same boat going to the same place, that’s hard for me to remember sometimes. I know he has the same feelings that I do, he just doesn’t cry like me or express his feelings the same way as I do, but he still has them.
Oh gosh we had such a great talk today, it was just a really nice talk. Some days we just have a general talk, I miss you I love you I miss you again. Not today, it was a great talk, and it was a 2way talk, not just me talking the whole time he talked too. Don’t get me wrong he does talk, but he’s a guy, and sometimes he just has nothing to say really. He said today that he cant believe how I have made him open up and talk, he has never been a real big talker but he wants to talk with me he wants to tell me things that are going, and that make me happy.
Sometimes I tend to refer to myself as “fat” or “big” and he does not like that at all, not one bit. He said something very cute to me today, he said that no one knows you like I know you and no one can see exactly what I see in your heart. He said he does not like it when I say I am fat or big or talk down about myself because he loves me and that’s all that matters and I am beautiful to him. I have never had someone care about me as much as he does, besides my family of course, and not very many people in my life have told me I am beautiful that feels nice to hear especially from the guy I love with all my heart.
As we were talking today he said to me, if I were any other gal Im sure we would have been broken up by now. That kind of shocked me, but in a way I almost felt the same way as he did, because if he was not as awesome as he is I don’t think we would have lasted either. If someone would of said to me a year ago I would be marring a man from India, I would have probably said yeah right. Now as I look back I couldn’t imagine my life without Tom, who would I talk to all day, who would I have to speak with when Im upset, who would I have to have little arguments with? I just couldn’t imagine not having him really.
He makes me smile when he says the things I do are special, but I don’t think they are special its just what I do. I think like this, I treat people the way I want people to be treated, so I do little things for people that I would want done for me. That’s the best way I can explain it I guess, I just treat people with respect.
Just think about it like this, emails are special, and yes I enjoy getting emails, but I would enjoy a card in the mail too. I think when I think about it, all you have to do is turn your computer on and write a letter, not that that’s not special don’t get me wrong. But think how you feel when you open your mailbox and you have letter or a little package in it that puts a smile on my face instantly, and that’s how I would like other people to feel too.
That’s how I want our friends to feel, like we took the time to send them something, especially because most of them live half way around the world. I want his sister and his parents to know that we were thinking about them when we go on vacation or when it’s Christmas time by sending them something.
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